Someone recently wrote me on MySpace and asked for a female perspective on an issue. I hope he doesn't mind, but I started thinking this might actually help others.
"I have an interesting scenario i'd like to share with you.... it involves this friend of mine... i'm curious of your opinion in this particular circumstance... which is: my friend is attractive, well-off & always ends up with psycho gold-diggers. As a result of this ongoing pattern/issue, he's recently become active involved in spiritual groups for getting a deeper understanding of life's purpose & most importantly to find someone of pure connection/intent. what is peculiar is that this thing called 'connection' is an even larger mystery to him than all else. in fact, he's asked me how to "know it". I have an idea, but I think its better if i consult a woman's opinion... so my question to you is: hormones aside, what signs clearly indicate a woman is stable & pursuing a man for his character & not his bank account? or in other words, how do you know her intentions are pure?
just curious, there's no right or wrong answer... i just think my own opinion may lack scope... any input is greatly appreciated. I value your opinion. "
HERE IS MY ANSWER...I'M CERTAINLY NO EXPERT, BUT IF IT HELPS EVEN ONE PERSON, IT'S WORTH PUTTING OUT THERE!
Anyway, as for your friend's situation--that's an easy one. However, most men will not implement the answer. This is due to the fact that their hormones ufortunately "rule" over common sense. And the "hot chicks" are usually 99.9% the gold diggers.
Nonetheless, I have been EXTREMELY independent since I was very young. Being "pushed out of the nest," so to speak forced this upon me.
I have met many men who and still know a few who are VERY wealthy, but quite frankly, it is a turn off for me. 1) they are used to getting their way, 2) women sleep with them right off the bat because they are stupid enough to think giving them "the best sex they've ever had" will set them apart from the rest (Ha!), and 3) they get bored with them because their lack of intelligence arouses no "mental" stimulation whatsoever; therefore, they move onto the next "hot, gold-digging chick."
They will forever wonder, "If I am so successful and good looking, why can't I find the RIGHT girl!?" Ha! Come on now...USE that OTHER brain of yours if you want the realistic answer.
Here you are....
1) Become attracted to a different breed of woman
2) Don't go for "all looks" right off the bat
3) A woman who doesn't need you is a great start!
4) A woman who doesn't do drugs, smoke or drink every weekend is a good start, too. (Addictions mean problems mentally -- usually severe insecurity)
5) Someone who doesn't want to see you all the time is a clue of a more enticing, more intelligent woman.
6) Let me add...it is if she doesn't want to see you all the time because she is busy WORKING, not playing the field. You should still be able to connect via telephone on the days you don't see each other.
7) Do NOT look to get "some" for at least one month! Come on, you can do it! Try for two months...perhaps three! This will assure your dating each other will strictly be about getting to KNOW each other to SEE if you have anything in common. You can always get "some" (hopefully you are SMART enough to wear protection!) by the bimbos looking for your cash while you keep dating the "right" one and get to know her.
8) If the pressure's off for physical contact, go on some dates that you both have an interest in going to see or do. Conversation should increase, thereby increasing your chemistry.
9) Do NOT talk about what you own, how much money you have, or brag about anything related to materialistic objects or cash! I can't STAND that! And why on EARTH would you want to share that with me unless you were insecure or just looking to get laid!?
10) Be YOURSELF for a change. Stop trying to impress! Be a gentleman, but not arrogant and cocky. Confidence is the key, but without the arrogance.
11) If you are not interested after the second date, move on.
12) If you are looking online, don't just go for the looks. READ the profile, and read INTO what the profile really means!
Okay, those are some starters....let me know if you have any other questions :o)
FEEL FREE TO WRITE AN ARTICLE AND POST YOUR FEEDBACK...YOU MIGHT AGREE OR DISAGREE!
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